The financial reckoning

Had a lovely eve last night with my mate SJ. He’s an old buddy from my days at The Telegraph and we met up for a gossip and to chuck some ideas around about his next career move. He was with a couple of colleagues and they were sharing a bottle of red wine, but I happily imbibed my sparkling water and stayed for a few hours of bitching, cackling and putting the world to rights, as we do.

Funnily enough I caught the whiff of the wine as it was being poured and was quite turned off. It failed to make me yearn for some as it has often done in the past. It was quite a vinegary and rancid smell, which was no reflection on the quality as it was a jolly nice pub and their selection was fine. I simply believe that this was the sort of eve when I would have drunk out of habit, rather than from enjoyment of the vino on offer. I was reading recently that there are days when wine tastes good (all plummy and spicy and warming) and days when it tastes bad (all acidic such that it catches in the back of your throat) depending on the lunar cycle: http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2009/apr/18/wine-lunar-calender-tesco-supermarkets .
Whilst I have often considered how hormones might affect taste, I’ve never really embraced the biodynamic movement (all Gwynnie ‘pale and sickly looking’ Paltrow in my mind). That said, I am more than prepared to accept that lots of factors come in to play so whether it’s fact, mumbo jumbo or witchcraft, I do appreciate that the allure of the wine will vary from day to day and therefore challenge me to varying degrees. Maybe I should simply stay at home and lock myself away on fruit days, though am not so sure that my boss will understand!

I was sorting out my finances yesterday, as I am in charge of the household budget. K hands that all over to me and I’ve been accused of anal retentiveness by many, as I have everything on a spreadsheet so that nothing takes me by surprise...Still, it’s my nature to be organised and I wouldn’t be an office manager if such things didn’t come naturally.

So I got to thinking about the amount I have spent over the years on booze. A rough calculation had me blowing (including big party nights out) say £200 a month, though if I am honest it was more like £300 if you factor in the following: taxis home when bladdered, coffees and carbs on way to work and at lunch the day after (my super-food salads having been discarded in favour of a stodgy ham and cheese baguette and lemon drizzle cake), umbrellas various left on trains etc etc. Even up until recently I was probably frittering away the best part of £40 a week on the whole boozing lifestyle, given the cost of a good bottle of wine and a pack of fags per session. Granted, fizzy water still costs and I won’t be going out for free but, at the same time, I am sure I can easily keep beverages down to about oooh £50 a month in total.

So I have about £150 extra a month to play with and that frightens me. I’ve been in London since October 1997. Given the amount that I estimate having frittered per month, with some deducted as I would have still gone out even if I hadn’t drunk, thereby working on £250 per month, I could have saved… wait for it, deep breath…£34,500.00…and breathe.

Did I really write that? I have absolutely nothing to show for it other than a ‘wine belly’ some UDIs that have healed over the years but are still visible and sweet yet hazy memories of a number of conquests….

Even if I chose to carry on spending that amount each month rather than simply adding it to either my savings or my pension (which would be just that bit tooooo sensible and sober!) I could use it for the following: 3 haircuts and some very expensive shampoo; 3 sessions of acupuncture and dinner at our local tapas/thai place; a totally indulgent spa day in a top London hotel; an a la carte lunch at The Ritz for 2; 2 pairs of decent shoes or 1 pair of fabulous shoes. All of these things would be beneficial to my health and appearance and would constitute a ‘treat’. None of them would leave me waking up the next day wondering ‘what happened last night, and where am I?’ as a heavy session has done on many an occasion. All are perfectly attainable and will spur me on to at least the end of this month. Watch out The King’s Road, here I come!!!!